Crying Man

A gentle grown man with an American accent is clinging himself against the wall crying; He doesn't want to leave his house - Is it really his house? The house is empty except for a cornflex box, religious books and a suitcase already packed. There is nothing else to do, he is being told. The disengagement, the evacuation, it will be done. It's better to go quietly so that no-one would get hurt.

He stays up. Doesn't move. Partially whispering, probably trying to shout but being too drained from the crying to do so, he sings the now-common phrase "A jew does not drive out another jew". We heard that phrase so many times during training, we screamed these slogans at each other during training, when simulating the settlers. After the first week of training was over, it seemed logical to me that a good portion of what the training did was make us less sensitive to these words; Words that caused us all embarrasment, sadness, anger and sometimes arose humouristic remarks from us; This done so we could do this task in a slightly easier mind.

Obviously, it all sinks in eventually; And looking at this man crying, holding a book - most likely a Bible - I felt the tears building up in my throat. He was gently put down to a sitting position, from there four people held him from his arms and legs, making sure he can't fall and that the way they're holding him was as gentle as possible while still managing to hold his body weight. It wasn't the first time I felt like crying in the disengagement process and unfortunately, it won't be the last.